“how you shout into the forest it comes back”
“what doesn’t kill you makes you strong”
“don’t bite the hand that is feeding you”
“Giving the pinky finger and the whole arm is taken”
There’s so much truth and wisdom preserved in old sayings and we probably All know these few in one form or another by personal experiences….
The first on the list is pretty obvious and refers to the principle of resonance – we All get back what we put out “vibrationally”…. What does that mean – vibrationally…. Well, it’s when we lie to ourselves – when we think we do something for a specific reason but “subconsciously” we think different…. Such can have many different reasons and isn’t mean as judging or that we’re “bad” or something alike, no, it’s just something that happens and it’s the reason why we often can’t get “back” what we actually want…. We therefore can go with that and feel bad about the world or we can start to work with it – we can try to become aware of the “subconscious”, underlaying truth within self and either “transform”/change this or send out and act accordingly….
But maybe it all goes even further than this - what if that's the reason why we like to "consume" so much of whatever? Maybe we just go to a shop and buy whatever as through this very direct exchange we can make sure we actually get what we think we want.... ???
Yes, we do gain strength and information from painful experiences – there’s always “good” in the bad, like in the Chinese “Yin and Yang” symbol…. First of all we know that we can go through such and come out ok on the other side, which gives us trust into Self…. Doesn’t mean we want to repeat it though but if it happens we know we can…. But then there’s also “information” in the meaning of “cause and effect” – we may know “how” it happened, what was the “origin” or cause of what had happened and so we know to where such will lead and we can try to create a different cause next time… not avoiding but “creatively” use the information gained….
Now this 3rd one on my small list is a bit more tricky – “don’t bite the hand that feeds you” in Swiss German we have a saying that goes “little bird eat or die”… both pretty brutal right 😉 … In my opinion we All “feed ourselves” as of what we do all the time – even if we work for a company, we do “something” and there will be whatever kind of customer who will pay and we get a share of this all (if it’s a fair one or not isn’t the topic here)…. So from this perspective we do feed ourselves either directly or indirectly… from this perspective, if we know our “worth” we will feed ourselves well but if we “bite”/poison ourselves with doubts or any thoughts of “unworthiness” or similar, it may become difficult…..
“giving the pinky finger and the whole hand/arm is taken”… we All know how it generally is used nowadays and I don’t know what intention it was originally have included but I have thought about it and had the idea that it also talks about “vibration” or kind of “alignment” in the sense of when we make “concessions”/give in to something that at first looks like something “small” or not so “important” we can suddenly be “pulled” into something much bigger that does matter…. Similar to an expression we use in Switzerland when someone is falling in love – we then say something like “it took your arm/sleeve in”…. and from this view-point we could also say it’s about “focus” or “attention” to something, that it “pulls us in”….
Giving the pinky finger and the whole arm is taken” - more thoughts....
There are not only the “energy Vampires” but also the kind of “abusive people” to mention two “extremes”… it’s in my experience starting very slowly, piece by piece and for a long time not “noticeable” to most… through the mechanism of attraction, the “victim” will meet the “offender” and the other way round….
I will share here some conclusions I made from personal experiences – yes, of course, my life is different to yours as we’re All different but we share the similarities of the “mechanics” behind…. Our memories are personal resources that hold truth about the very own abilities, strengths and weaknesses to become aware of and “mastering”, transforming them…
I was in a so called “abusive relationships” for some time. I spare you with any details, as there was a lot on both sides that happened and that lead to the reactions and actions that in the end “escalated”.. I describe here out of "my" view....
Feeling “thankful” for whatever, feeling “less” and not “worth”, obscure fears/worries/ thoughts like being alone or having failed as well as not wanting to be “selfish”, to be “good” and so on. This leads to “excuses” as well as to “concessions”…
These “concessions” might be just little things here and there and I remember thinking, “oh yes, that I can do, it’s not as important, never mind” and so on… little things start to “pile up” and one day I realized that I don’t even recognize myself anymore nor did I “like” what I have become. I felt trapped, helpless and hopeless…
Trying to find a solution first within the relationship and later to actually try to find a way out… both didn’t work out because I wasn’t ready to lose too much on the material level nor did the laws here support me in this way….
Escalation…. It became very “physical” and I feared for my physical wellbeing/life… That’s when row “survival instinct” sets in – very interesting it was - so many thoughts ran through my mind in “split seconds” and then suddenly an absolute calmness, clarity and knowing about the situation and how to react/act came over me – it was totally astonishing…
Material values/money/property ceases to be of any importance in such a moment but instead a kind of total surrender to the moment….
“Help”, opportunities start to open….
Usually that’s when the “movies finish” but it goes on…..
Release after shock leads to the question “what next” with all insecurities, worries and fears…and of course the pain....
Judging self and others as well as blame and anger, distrust and so on that may result from that but also trying to heal Self by first realizing how much of “that Self” you knew is gone and so a “re-inventing” of Self starts and there might be many of those to follow after…. because there are so many layers....
Focus on regaining some kind of “stability” and a feeling of safety, which can be a pretty long process… it took me a year until I trained myself enough to go alone at night to have a glass of wine to a place I before frequently visited – I “trained” at night markets with many people around and places I previously didn’t go to…. It doesn’t matter what it is, it’s important to do something “forward”…..
This was 10 years ago and many other things have happened after as there had some more “steps missing”:
Realization of the own “part” in the stories… all is a mirror of oneself …. I then sadly went into the phase of “self-blame” and distrust of the own judgments/perceptions.
Realization that this “self-blame” and distrust was actually what lead into the hole “story” in the first place…. = loops
Realization of the actual “beauty” behind this all, that we really and truly are the creators of our very own reality 😊 … that means everyone is – so there’s absolutely no need for blame or judgment of anybody because we’re All just in one phase or another and a “victim” is also always an “offender” and the other way around…. No excuse but reality…. And it leads to the realization of where we have the tendency to be an offender ourselves, against ourselves and against others….
Ohh, I had the opportunity many times before in my life to do change/transform but I wasn’t ready to face it, so things had to become really tough 😉 but on the other hand, I did collect a lot of information - sometimes I call it "crash course", lol
I made the experience that every time when I finally chose “myself” and stood up for what I thought to be right for myself and didn’t worry about what I could maybe lose, doors opened…. I yes, maybe had to go through a time with “less” materials/outside security only to “rise” again…
Sometimes we’re so much in the “frozen” state that we can’t see the “truth/reality” even if it’s right in front of us and so we’re “hit in the face” with it in the sense of so trapped, so hurt, so pushed to limits that eventually the “survival instinct” kicks in and that’s not only about “romantic relationships” or at work but in all societies/communities and matters – it’s how liberation but also revolutions start….
It can be stopped before though - and I think that's what we can do by being aware of how these things "work". We can simply say "no" and "ask" for a solution towards something else that is serving or directly a "goal"...
Much Love to you All,